Sooooo I started eating clean in January – with a few lapses due to time/energy/waiting on a shipment. I’m happy with the weight I’ve lost but I’m frustrated it isn’t more. I lost 120lbs in less than a year in 2011. Now, granted I was at the gym 5 days a week and Zumba class twice a week and had a personal trainer once a week. I’m not doing Zumba, I don’t have a personal trainer and I don’t go to the gym, but I do walk outside an hour a day 6 days a week and do a recommended workout 3-6 days a week.
I intermittent fast every day and lately rarely eat 1000 in a day and the scales just don’t seem to be moving at least not as fast as I want them to. Often my brain goes to wanting pasta and bread, but I don’t let it get out of control and just shut it out.
Then occasionally, I get really weak/sad and all I want to do is go buy all the bad things I haven’t had all year and just binge on them, but I don’t. Am I going to fight this battle forever? My guess is yes. Sometimes I wonder if it’s worth it…sometimes I wonder if being “healthy” is better than finding some “happiness,” then I ask myself – how is “happiness” junk food, pasta and bread?
This is a crazy journey and I honestly have no idea where it’s going to take me. My logical brain knows that what I’m doing is “best” for me, but I’d be lying if I didn’t say it was hard. I argue with myself almost daily.
I also get very fed up with vendors who can’t manage to meet expectations. A second shipment in a row from Wild Pastures was damaged en route and they’ve done NOTHING about it so far. So I’ve had to buy at the grocery store which is just insanely expensive. I emailed to complain no response so I’m calling today to complain.